Osho World Online Magazine :: June 2012
In Focus
Transform Your Life Into A Quest By Ma Anand Bhagawati
Transform Your Life Into A Quest By Ma Anand Bhagawati

A surprising outcome of a new study, published in the British medical journal Lancet recently, shows that more and more young Indian women and men are committing suicide. Suicide is now the second most common death for young Indians between 15 and 29 years of age; incredibly, the highest rates of suicide were among the wealthy and educated, and notably females were also more likely to kill themselves than males, which is the reverse of what researchers usually find.

Professor Vikram Patel of the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine and lead author said to the Hindu that it is hard to say why such a contrast exists. He theorized,

“One possibility is that the higher rates of suicide in the more developed and educated communities of India may be attributed to the greater likelihood of disappointments when aspirations that define success and happiness are distorted or unmet by the reality faced by young people in a rapidly changing society where jobs may be higher paying but less secure and where social networking more accessible but loneliness more common.”

In 2010, 1.87 lakh people committed suicide in India. According to Professor Patel, about half of suicide deaths (49% among men, and 44% among women) were due to poisoning, mainly ingesting of pesticides. Hanging was the second most common cause for men and women, while burns accounted for about one-sixth of suicides by women. He said he feels that with the decline in maternal death rates, suicide could soon become the leading cause of death among young women in India.

He told Times of India, "Overall, more Indian men commit suicide than women, but the male to female ratio for suicides is smaller in India than in many Western countries, in particular among youth. Studies have suggested that social factors such as violence and depression are key determinants of suicide in women."

Why this staggering increase in suicides? Adapting to Western values and lifestyle after centuries of a more pastoral way of life can increase anxiety and ego-ridden desires to succeed; the latter often triggered by parents who want their child to excel, reach the top ten of everything. However, this drive is unnatural and imbalanced. Obviously something vital is missing in these young people’s lives, otherwise why throw it away?

Osho says, “Transform your life into a quest. Question the values that you have accepted. Question all that you have been brought up to believe in. Question the way you have lived up to now. Question your mechanicalness, question your robotlike existence.

Yes, something drastic has to be done, but it is not suicide. It won't help, it won't change you; you will be back again in another womb somewhere. Millions of stupid couples are making love every moment. Beware! You will be caught in some net somewhere. And you will get only what you deserve, remember; you can't get more than you deserve. You get the womb that is right for you.

And dying in suicide is dying in such anguish, because it is one of the most unnatural things to do, most abnormal things to do. No animal commits suicide, no tree ever commits suicide – only man. Only man can go that insane. Nature knows nothing of suicide; it is man's invention. It is the most ugly act. And when you do something ugly to yourself you cannot hope that you will get a better life. You will die in an ugly state of mind and you will enter an uglier womb.

But what is the need to commit suicide? Just question: you must have lived in a wrong way, that's why life has not become a song. You must have lived foolishly, stupidly, unintelligently; that's why life has not attained to celebration. You cannot dance with joy with the stars and with the flowers and with the wind and with the rain, because you have lived with wrong kinds of ideas imposed on you by the same kind of people as you are.

It is a perpetual phenomenon; stupidity goes on perpetuating itself. Parents go on giving stupidity to their children and the children in their turn will hand over their stupidity to THEIR children. This is the heritage. This is called tradition, heritage, culture... great names!

Question all that you have lived without questioning up to now, and your life will have a new intelligence arising in it. Your life will become more sharp.”
Be Still and Know, Ch 10, Q 3

Parents are of course very disturbed if they find out how much their children are suffering of depression and anguish. Rather than dragging them to a psychologist or psychiatrist or push them harder, they ought to introduce them to meditation and moreover, they too should start meditating. India invented meditation! Indian people have their own strengths and values; there is no need to live according to Western ways and values which clearly aren’t even beneficial to Western populations.

As Osho points out, “We are eager for money, power, prestige, and when Westerners come to the East in search of religion, we laugh at them thinking they have gone mad. ‘What is wrong with them?’ we want to know. In the West there is a different kind of worry: people arrive from the East to become engineers, doctors, nuclear physicists in the West, and the Westerners wonder: ‘So, their search is also for the materialistic!’ And they feel disappointed: ‘What can we get from these people who are running to get help from us – who have no food and shelter, whose minds are set only on material desires?’

This is the crisis – that the East is losing what it has gathered over so many centuries, and the West is anxious to find that of which it has come to know only in the past few centuries. So what is the crisis in it? The crisis is that what the East already has will be lost and the West will have to start from ABC.”
Nowhere To Go But In, Ch 16


Sarjano It is difficult to get married in India if you are a foreigner, an Italian like me, for example. So, I finally decided to place an ad in the ‘Matrimonial’ section of the local newspaper. I was reluctant to make such a move, because it was going to create “a contradiction in terms”. As plain as that, but finally I did it:

 “Italian writer, owner of a Restaurant in Goa,
 seeks a SIMPLE woman to marry.”

 I just asked for “a simple woman”. And here lies the contradiction – for, simple women do not read the local (English) newspaper, and even less the matrimonial ads on Sunday!

The first bride-to-be who called my number started just the way I had feared:

“Are you Catholic?”

 “Ma’am...” – I replied patiently, “Isn’t it a funny question, to start a conversation with a question?”

"I mean, do you believe in Jesus?"

"Ma’am,” – I said patiently – "You ask for it, you'll get it! No, I never believed in Jesus and I will never, meaning never, believe in him...and do you know why? Because I know him! To believe or not to believe is for stupid people...but I KNOW him!"

 She had no sense of humour, predictably, and she never called back. Thank you, Jesus!

As strange as it may sound, it went on like this for the whole day, with women asking me "How tall are you? “ – and other inanities of this kind. By the evening I was totally frustrated, and then, she called.

Her voice was shy and tentatively casual… and soft. So soft to be almost inaudible.

 ”I am sorry... I’ve never answered to a matrimonial ad before…”

“That’s okay, I myself never put one up before!”

“Then... I have to warn you…” she added, almost shameful – “I... I am a Muslim.”

 “And I have to warn you that if there is someone on this earth who doesn’t give a damn, whatever religion you belong to… that’s me!”

 At this, she sounded much more relaxed and proposed to meet, some time. Somewhere.

 I couldn’t possibly wait, so I proposed to meet half way, the very next morning.
“I’ll be wearing a red blouse,” – she informed me.

I was very calm and relaxed, the next morning in front of Calangute fish market. I even managed to buy some fish for the restaurant, while waiting.

 Her name was Anju, and she was simply beautiful! I was standing there like an idiot, absolutely speechless, and totally incredulous that it was really happening. And, happening to me.

We looked at each other for quite a long time, incapable of uttering a single word, until I proposed to get out of there, on my scooter.

On the way, I realized that I should drop the fish at my residence, but I didn’t want to give the impression that I was taking her to my home so quickly! So I decided to drop the fish at the house, while
 inviting Anju to wait in the garden and enjoy the breeze and the greenery.

 I was opening the fridge in the kitchen, when I heard someone entering the house.

 "Can I come in?”- asked the voice of Anju tentatively.

“If you can? You’ll have to, one day! And I’m delighted it’s happening now...”

When she stood in front of me, she looked into my eyes and said simply, as a matter of fact:
 “I love you…”

These simple words nearly knocked me out! Hey, nobody had ever told me “I love you,” before I
uttered these words… Hey, is this a dream or what?

 The next day, I had to go to Panjim and I decided to give her a call. Anju was free in that moment and 20 minutes later she was magically seated opposite me. She was sporting black trousers, red lipstick, and she was definitely quite cool.

 I couldn’t resist one of my brutal and abrupt questions: “Your family must be quite a liberal one... isn’t it so?”

 Anju’s face became instantly sad: “My family is very traditional, very conservative and orthodox…” (she paused) ...”Would you consider becoming a Muslim?”

“Listen, Anju, I’ll do anything for you. Meaning ‘any /thing’, even go living in Amazonia or Alaska. I’ll do anything for you, except become a Muslim. I simply invite you to be free, not to embrace another religion. I invite you to dare for your love. Nothing can stop love, when it is true love.”

 Her eyes were full of tears, while crying: “It is impossible! Simply impossible. They will never, I repeat,
NEVER give me their blessings if I don’t marry a Muslim…. You cannot understand!”

 “Anju my love, there is only one thing I understand in life, and that’s enough, more than enough, and that is: ‘no / thing can stop love’. As simpleas that. This is my only truth, my only religion, my only god, take it or leave it! Just trust. How can’t you trust the power of love?”

She couldn’t.

I hadn’t even finished my sentence (it turned out to be a ‘death-sentence’) when Anju literally disappeared. Simply ran away, gone!

In vain I tried to call her; from that day onwards her cell was eternally off.
In vain I sent specific sms. No answer.

Since that day, Anju has completely and deliberately disappeared from my life.

And I'm still looking for a simple woman to marry!

Osho World Online Magazine :: July 2012
2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001